This week's fast: fasting from indignation

A recent episode of 30 Rock made me crack up but also hit very close to home.  I realized, to my dismay, that on the New York subway, I am Liz Lemon.  And while I still feel morally justified to call attention to the rudeness and incivility riding the rails, seeing it played for laughs gave me a little pause.

Add to that today, the seven-year-old in the backseat reminding me once again, as my righteous road indignation moved perilously close to rage, that yelling at drivers who cannot hear me only upsets me and my passengers.  And to cement the lesson, she quoted a recent commercial aimed at reducing road rage.  When my seven-year-old daughter is the moral role model, it is past time to carefully consider what type of example I am setting.

So I tried a little experiment after dropping my little role model off at school:  for every trigger that usually sets off my moral indignation alarm, I would take a breath and try to concentrate on examples I see of compassion and decency.  Let me tell you, it was not easy.  On the five minute-walk to the subway, there were pedestrians not paying attention to traffic, drivers leaning on horns out of impatience rather than actual danger, and teenagers being, well, teenagers.   I hadn't even gotten to the train platform, which always invites numerous opportunities to question just how people are raised.

But I was determined, and I concentrated on my late grandmother's voice, my touchstone for gentleness, compassion, and calm.  And I saw things that I ordinarily would have missed:  how many drivers actually do stop and waive pedestrians through unregulated intersections, parents (mostly fathers today) showing great love and patience with their toddlers and babies, the woman who not only remembered her iced coffee cup at her feet on the train, but actually took it off the train with her.  I know, I know, simple things, but I was struck by how differently I felt getting off the train today by focusing on these positive examples rather than the examples of incivility that usually drive me crazy.

And I realized, that at least so far today, that I am behaving more civilly myself.  Hopefully, my daughter will be proud.

Here's hoping your Friday fast gives you moments of calm reflection as well.
Peace