How could it possibly be a year since I posted here? This was supposed to be a regular meditation on 21st century Catholicism, from a moderate feminist point of view, and yet, here it sits, waiting...
I went to St. Patrick's Cathedral today to get my ashes and find some quiet reflection time. It was the first time I'd ever really been inside the cathedral, which seems incredible to me, having lived in New York City for nearly twelve years. In the past, when I've been working all day, I've tried to squeeze in some time to run uptown to the Church of St. Paul the Apostle, but since it is truly no longer my church, and my work had me on 5th Avenue and 59th Street today, it seemed like as good a time as any to visit St. Patrick's. What an amazing space. The procedure for ashes was very organized, and seemed very New York: knowing that many NYC Catholics are away from their home churches during the work day, and as a major tourist attraction, St. Patrick's had separate lines designated for "ashes only". You could still come into the church and look around, or come in for one of the daily masses, but if you were just dashing in quickly during lunch or after work (as I was), there was a place for you.
I like that about St. Patrick's, and St. Paul is like that too. I understand other churches, including my own new home church, wanting parishioners to slow down and really have us reflect on the meaning of Ash Wednesday with a service, then your ashes, and perhaps even Eucharist. I'm respectful of that desire, even when some priests (who shall remain nameless, and not anyone at the aforementioned churches) berate the folks who do show up for services for being "once or twice a year Catholics" (It's NYC for goodness sakes, on a Wednesday, and you're a midtown church. You're lucky they chose your church out of the hundreds. Deep sigh. Yes, I feel better now). But I appreciate a pastor, and a church, who recognize that providing multiple opportunities for reflection and practice on a holy day of "opportunity!" invites more of us to worship, and perhaps keeps many of us in the church. Not a bad thing to consider in these times of increasing secularism, and scandals that distress and disappoint more and more Catholics daily.
I got my ashes, and I spent some time in reflection. I've nearly decided what my Lenten journey will entail this year (perhaps next year, I'll have it figured out by Shrove Tuesday). Of course it will look a lot like last year, and hopefully I can be even more faithful to my Lenten fast:
- Fasting from anger, especially on the subway and in the car (count to ten, sing, just don't push or honk)
- Fasting from extravagance--goodbye, Visa card!
- Fasting from the desire to control too much, or as Sr. Margaret used to say, "let go and let God!"
- More reflection please--meditation, yoga, finding comfort in stillness
And writing, writing, writing. Here in this blog, on that story I keep returning to in my head but not on the computer, my family history. Perhaps Easter will find me a calmer, prolific person.
More to come, perhaps even weekly.
Happy Lent.
